My dirty secret; Mascara Anonymous

I have a confession to make.

I am addicted to make up. And not just any- specifically mascara.

Okay, here’s how it went down. My mother started putting make up on me when I was about six for fancy family photos. Not even kidding. It was usually blush, lip gloss, … and my old dear friend, mascara.

check out that smokin seven year old blonde in the back!

check out that smokin seven year old blonde in the back!

 

Once the Regan recession hit us hard, we couldn’t afford fancy studio quality photos, so my mother took to doing her own. She again appointed herself chief makeup artist.

can't tell the difference between my mom's work and a professional, right?

can’t tell the difference between my mom’s work and a professional, right?

(I think my sisters may hunt me down and kill me after this blog. Who cares! Onto victory)

Looking at that photo… it’s supposed to be a holiday one… I don’t know what’s worse; the make up, that my mom considered purple to be ‘holiday enough’ for me, or my FLY POPPED COLLAR.

I was in a wedding once. This is what happened:

4th grade and the 80s were still goin STRONG

4th grade and the 80s were still goin STRONG

Well, when I entered middle school at the tender age of ten, my mom actually told me I could wear mascara, in her words, “As long as you don’t look like a whore”. She was such a tactful parent. So I did what any ten year old given enough slack would do! I wore make up to school.

a perm, oh lord it's a perm!

a perm, oh lord it’s a perm!

^That’s me in middle school. I don’t look like a whore!

So years upon years of wearing it, and mascara has become my shield. My armor. My necessity. I cannot leave the house without it. Yesterday I got in my car to run a quick errand and in the *chance* someone might look into my car and notice me before I had my shower, I PUT ON MAKE UP.

Seriously. My morning is: A) shower, B) HIDE THOSE BLOND EYELASHES ASAP

Seriously. My morning is: A) shower, B) HIDE THOSE BLOND EYELASHES ASAP

So…. the next time you see me at a Dregs show putting on make up… it’s just my addiction, baby. 25 years of something can’t be WRONG!

what? a girl being worried about her appearance is period!

what? a girl being worried about her appearance is period!

 

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About Author: Molly
Molly has been hogging the spotlight since she first started playing the violin in 1988. She soon realized a life of performance and poverty is more exciting than earning a sustainable living, so she double majored in music and theater. After years of romping around at reputable places in the Twin Cities including The Minnesota Opera Chorus, Bloomington Civic Theater, and The Jungle Theater, Molly lowered her standards and gave The Dregs a try in 2010 and finally made this 'Irish' band legit with a fiddle player. Molly is going to graduate school for her masters in education to hopefully learn how she went so very wrong.

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